The Queen and I
by xCharlie-Groupiex
Summary: "Being without her, coming in second to Sam, remaining a king without his queen for even one more day, were just not things that he could or was going to accept." Caine's thoughts on Diana and their history with each other. Oneshot. Ratedforoneswear.


**A/N: Set post PLAGUE. Minor spoilers. Just a slightly dramatic, musing Caine and Diana ficlet, Caine's thoughts on Diana, their history with each other, and pasts. Hope this is enjoyed. If you read, please review! Oneshot.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gone or any of its character, or the Gym Class Heroes song I used for the title of this story.**

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><p>The Queen and I:<p>

When not in a position where it was necessary to threaten her, he'd always done his best in keeping Diana's well being in tip top shape. Not many good things could be said about Caine Soren, but if you were faithfully loyal to him, there was a good chance, unless some factor motivated him otherwise, that he would be so to you too. Yes, physically, he'd always looked out for her—saved her life twice, even. Emotionally, though? That was a different story.

Needless to say, the boy was far from the sensitive type.

Maybe if he had taken her disappointment in him, in the hopes he had raised in her then promptly stepped on, even just a little bit more seriously, he'd still have her, to this day. He tried not to think on this reality, but found that he couldn't help it. As it was, he had not done so, had betrayed her trust and let her down, and so she'd left him in preference of joining his oh so perfect brother. Caine was a king now, which should have been everything to him, and his authority over the rest of his subjects at Perdido Beach was great, but yet without her as his queen he felt small. Never had Sam been so passionately hated in his book as he was now.

Because though Caine still thought himself—and let's face it, probably always would—better than his twin, for the first time in his life he found himself jealous of him. Okay, the two weren't a couple (as far as he knew, anyway, and were he to find out any different Sam was a dead man walking), but Sam still had Diana, which was more than Caine could say for himself. If only he weren't so successful in his quests of power taking, so ambitious! He'd used to think he'd never want to lose that part of himself, had for so long thrived on it, but now he felt different. It hadn't been until he'd lost her that he'd been truly able to open his eyes.

The loss of Diana had made him feel differently.

So yes, he wanted to be able to change, though a grudging part of himself wondered why he should feel he had to, but this didn't mean that in such an endeavour, should he even attempt it, he'd be successful. He could try all he liked, but Caine would most likely always be Caine; just like Diana would always be Diana. Haughty (like himself), clever, beautiful, and hard but yet soft as anything on the inside, was it any wonder he missed her so much? And more than just sexually, though that too. It had, after all, been more than two weeks since he had last seen her.

Felt more like two years, though, to Caine.

How he longed to kiss her and hold her in his arms! At first, shocked and stung by her departure, the abandonment, he'd been so angry and full of confusion and hurt that lament over her decision had been difficult to feel. He'd flown into a rage, one not so becoming of a king but face red and various objects racing about his room only to collide with a wall and shatter or smack with a thud into the window, all the same. Now that the anger had more or less died down, however, though he was still prone to random outbursts of it, he was more so filled with sadness, and able to recognize that he was just as guilty as she was when it came to deception and betrayal.

Why were they so in the habit of harming those which they loved? Caine was well capable of doing so to the people he hated, excelled in it, really, but why had he been unable to draw the line at Diana? Had he been, she would be here with him right now—still his confidante, as she'd always been, still his partner in crime, still his in general. She'd still be, were he more like Sam; and just thinking this had another wave of jealousy surging within him once more.

He'd never be able to say so to her face, he knew, but here in his lonely quarters, in what had once been Mayor Sam's then swiftly Mayor Edilio's room with an imaginary Diana present, playing pretend, he told her how much he missed and cherished her. Said it out loud, too. _"Diana, come back to me. You know I'm nothing without you."_

Whether in real life she would respond positively to these pleas, he did not know. Probably not, and this Caine would have understood, though for which still have blamed her. It wasn't like he deserved her, had ever really taken her feelings into true consideration or treated them well. Most likely she'd refuse ever to come back-even as convincing as he was and as good of a lover as he, from the sound of her moans still in his memory, conceitedly considered himself to be.

Of course, it would figure that just as he crossed into a new chapter of life with Diana he'd manage to screw things up and in the process lose her completely. She'd been trying to better herself, had felt desperate need to, and he'd purposely led her on, falsely convinced her that he was capable of doing so, too. If that wasn't good reason to dump a person's ass, Cain wasn't sure what was, but still he held it against her, unable not to. She may have stayed with him when he needed her most, cared for him when when none else had after being left disabled and disoriented by the gaiaphage, but still he held her accountable for his current pain he was going through. Even as this was for something he had undeniably forced her to have to do.

He could understand it, but that did not mean he accepted it. He still thought of Diana as a bitch, a heartless, though still loved, bitch, for joining his greatest and now only enemy, even as her leaving him was his own doing. Even as it was his own fault that despite herself she'd been forced to act the role of a bitch, and even as her being one had never really bothered him before. Were Howard still around he'd employ himself on daily missions of getting shit faced drunk in mourning of her absence. Howard was, however, _not _around, and though Albert _was_, even with Caine's status, booze was no longer as easily accessible as it had used to be.

So not only was he in a position of having to suffer the loss of her, but also to endure it sober, too.

The truth of it was very real: Diana Ladris had finally gotten so fed up she had left him. The lake where Sam's party was located wasn't so very far from here, but when he thought upon the reality of the previous fact it felt like he was never going to see her again. Both of them very stubborn and hard headed, and though giving in and going to see her first was the last thing he wanted to do, he couldn't let that happen, never again look into that one of a kind face. Not something he'd be able to do, nuh uh. There was no way.

He had to do something. Nobody walked away from him, and definitely not Diana. Not without some sort of consequence or being forced to come back; and he was miserable without her, that much was for sure. It must be what she wanted, being away from him, since going with Sam had been a conscious decision made on her part, but though this humbled Caine Soren a little, in the long run, compared to his need of her, her wants didn't matter one bit.

Selfish, sure, but he had never denied that this was something he indeed very much was. Diana _would_ return to him. Even if he had to levitate her from the Lake where she was now living to Perdido Beach the whole way. Maybe she'd fight him on it at first, but she _would _do his will. If he had to, he'd make her.

Being without her, coming in second to Sam, remaining a king without his queen for even one more day, were just not things that he could or was going to accept.

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><p><strong>AN: So that's it! I lovelovelove CainexDiana and their whirlpool relationship. Much as I enjoy their drama I do hope they end up together, somehow, in the end, though. Can't wait for the next book! Think it will be the last one? Not that I'm getting sick of the series, yet :P Thanks for reading, and please review with your thoughts ! **

**xox Sacha**


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